'You've availed of Sky now these three years past.  Are you happy with it?'

‘Sorry. I missed your name and number there..’

‘Is there any way we can improve our service to you?’

‘You must have another reason for calling me?’

‘What is your favourite feature of the Sky service?’

This wasn’t getting anywhere, but because it was that ‘dead’ part of the holiday period, I decided to humour him. I hiimmed, hummed and hawed, interjected the odd ‘Yes’ and generally stalled him until he inevitably came to the point.

‘The Insurance policy on your Sky apparatus has expired.

Now, it just happens that we are offering a special deal at the moment..’ 

‘Yes …’

‘For just £6.70 a month..’

‘Wait just there! 

You expect me to fork out £80 a year to insure your equipment against accidental damage, then pay for the service after that?’

‘Well, if you fail to take out insurance, your Sky service may fall completely, despite our best efforts..’

‘Stop!!   I've GOT IT !!!

I’ve just applied a bit of lateral thinking and worked out your name.

The name you wouldn’t tell me from the start of this conversation!’

‘Yes??  You have?

How come?’

‘You’re CHICKEN LICKEN, aren’t you?’

‘You’ve had Sky now for three years. Are you happy with the service?’ 

Ah cummonnn!!  It's not THAT funny!!