The man's tie was stained, his face was plastered with lipstick and a half empty bottle of gin was sticking out of his torn coat pocket. He opened his newspaper and began reading.

After a few minutes the man turned to the priest and asked,

"Tell me, Father, what causes arthritis?"

The priest replied,

"My Son, it is caused by loose living, being with cheap, wicked women, too much alcohol and contempt for your fellow man, sleeping around with prostitutes and a lack of personal hygiene."

The drunk muttered in response,

 "Well, I'll be darned,"

and returned to his paper.

The priest, thinking about what he had said, put his hand gently on the man's arm and apologized.

 "I'm sorry. I should not have come on so strong. How long have you had arthritis?"

"I don't have arthritis, Father,"

the drunk replied.

“I was just reading here that the Pope does."