The
place was Fountain Street
in Bessbrook, the date was sometime in the nineteen thirties.
Two
youths were leaning against a wall in the village; the boys were poor and were
out of work at that particular time. The
two young men slouched with both hands thrust deep down inside their trouser
pockets.
Walking
towards the two boys on the same side of the street was a lady; she carried in
her hand one of those wicker-shopping baskets, fashionable at the time. Across
the street and just coming up almost level with the two youths was the local
Parish Priest. The Priest was out
enjoying his usual morning walk.
At
this point the lady seeing the Priest on the other side of the street raised
her hand in a respectful gesture and called out, “Good morning Father”.
The
wicker basket slipped out of the lady’s other hand and bounced across the
pavement towards the two grinning youths. The basket came to a stop in an upright
position just in front of one of the boys.
The
youth stretched out his foot and neatly hooking up the basket with it, keeping
his leg straight, he lifted the wicker
basket up and presented it to the lady, at the same time saying cheekily,
“Here
you are Mrs! One basket returned to
you”.
The
Priest was incensed. Such a display of
laziness and bad manners he had never encountered before. Quickly the Priest crossed the street with
the intention of rebuking the two boys for their bad behaviour.
“That
was the laziest action I have ever witnessed in my whole life!” he scolded.
The
lady tried to defuse the situation by saying,
“It’s
all right Father, the boy was only trying to help.”.
“No!
No!” said the Priest,
“Bad
behaviour and laziness on that scale should not be tolerated”.
Turning
to the youth the Priest said,
“Young
man! This is outrageous! In fact, if you could show me another action
that is lazier than the one you have just preformed, then I shall give you two
shillings”.
“Hmm!? Two bob, you say?” said the youth.
“Yes!
Two shillings!” replied the old Priest.
Rotating
the side of his body towards the Priest, and still keeping his hands deep
within his trouser pockets, the youth bent his wrist forward so as to expose
the opening of the pocket to the Priest, and with a sly grin on his face, he
muttered,
“Well! Just drop it in there, Fadher!”