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Any printed medium, even electronic, ought to be careful in satirising others for grammatical or spelling errors. Newry Journal however has a history of rushing in where others dear to Fart. With his wife June, Doug Gunden is co-founder of America’s only specialist Bible proofreading company. He explained his company’s raison d’être and the secret of its success. ‘Since Mao Tse Tung’s fall from disgrace and the demise of the Little Red Book, the Holly Bible has returned as the best-selling book ever. There were a few temporary lapses historically speaking. For example the 1631 King James Version included the commandment, ‘thou shalt commit adultery’. There were unscrupulous people who took advantage before the corrected version came out a few years later. You’ve seen those placards behind the goals in soccer matches, John 8:11. It ought to read, ‘Go and sin no more’, but an early twentieth century version read, ‘Go and sin on more’. Again there were those who took this for a carte blanche. Football supporters especially. I blame that wee man for England’s present trouble with football lager-louts! The modern girl can claim holy exemption too! 1 Timothy 2:9 should read, ‘I would that women adorn themselves in modest apparel’, but an earlier version had the word ‘modern’ instead. That’s where the mini- and micro-dress, and the boob-tube originated. That version also omitted the second word ‘not’ from 1 Corinthians 6:9, ‘Know ye not that the unrighteous shall [not] inherit the Kingdom of God’. No wonder the world’s in a terrible state of chassis. So far no serious typographic errors have appeared in our versions. We're happy to put our books in the pubic arena. But we’re not resting on our Lauras. We always start each project with a payer. We’re still embarrassed about the press advertisement that we paid thousands for, that described us as ‘poofreaders’. I'm no poof! I’m married to June, amn't I?’
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