We like occasionally to update you with births and deaths from the Parish Bulletin:
Our sympathy and prayers go to the relatives of the recently deceased:
The public is respectfully informed that the renowned Doctor Taylor from Manchester, universally known as the water-doctor ………
Newry people abroad have it harder to access the Cathedral Parish Bulletins and so learn of the Recently Deceased – and the Newly Baptised. We like occasionally to offer this service by quoting from the latest bulletins. We quote verbatim from the bulletin and apologise for any unwitting error.
Officials in the Library in Memphis ordered the removal from the Crib display there of some figures it had deemed (on ‘politically-correct’ grounds, we presume) inappropriate. Perhaps someone had objected to the deification of a child born out of wedlock, the public flaunting of his parents, the prominence offered to strangely-dressed travellers – perhaps illegal immigrants. The infant Jesus, his mother, St Joseph and the three Wise Men were taken away.
There are Dervishes everywhere!
The new version of the Newry Journal has been launched with much needed extra features.
The programme for the Newry Drama Festival has been released.
‘I began driving backwards two years ago’, the taxi driver explained, ‘when I found I could only engage reverse gear. I soon realised I could drive just as well backwards as forwards. I had my gear box altered so that the forward gears work in reverse.
Now I’ve developed a whole reverse philosophy of life! You know you can improve a situation by going backwards. It was at this point that I was contacted by politicians all over the world. Tony Bliar is interested and of course, all the unionist politicians from Northern Ireland. I am waiting for offers.’
Harpo Devi has a mission to promote peace between his own people of India and those of traditional enemy Pakistan, but he wants to contribute to global harmony. He has reversed his taxi several hundred miles from his native Punjab across the Pakistani border. He went on,
‘I can drive at speeds of up to 100 kph. True, it’s dangerous and my passengers are sometimes nervous but I am confident. I have had only one serious accident. I have a severe backbone problem with always looking behind, and pains in my neck but I’m not giving up’.
Such dedication to a cause. That’s what we’ve been missing!