In the early hours of last Tuesday a major hurricane (Hurricane Shazza) and an earthquake measuring 5.8 on the Richter Scale hit Lurgan with its epicentre in Kilwilkee Estate. Victims were seen wandering around aimlessly, muttering “fukinell”. The hurricane decimated the area causing almost £30 worth of damage. Several priceless collections of mementos from Majorca […]
Single farmer in the autumn of his years, seeks sensitive, nubile young nymphomaniac for housekeeping purposes and maybe more. I can offer your own bedroom too, if ever you feel the need to use it! Must have wide, ‘child-bearing’ pelvis.