Bear-fasced Cheek

‘When we first noticed him, he was going totally crazy, ripping off branches from the trees in that garden, tearing up the lawn and roaring something terrible.  Then he just s*a* right out there in the open view of everyone. 
He was like a bear with a sore head!’ she quipped.
Which is exactly what he was!  Lisa Baker campsite worker at the Baker Lake Resort, near Seattle was called out to help remove him.  The lawn was littered with dozens of empty beer cans that had been ripped rather than prised open.  Wildlife ranger Bill Hickok took up the story,
‘The bear drunk about thirty-six cans of beer.  He was something of a beer sophisticate.  At first he’d tried a can of mass-market Busch beer but he didn’t like it and abandoned the other cans before turning to Rainier Beer.  They’re twice the price and twice the beer!  He’d stolen them all from the campers’ cool boxes. 
He nursed his hangover for two days in the woods.  Then he returned to quench his thirst again.  He scared off all the campers while he searched their belongings for Rainier Beer.  We had to set a trap for him.  A hard-drinking bear can be a dangerous proposition.  We caught him with doughnuts and honey and enough Rainier Beer to anaesthetise him for a while. 
He has been re-located to a drying-out clearing in a distant part of the woods,’   he added.  
Rather facetiously, I thought!

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