John McCullagh October 21, 2005
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ALL the following were ACTUAL answers on the inane TV show Family Fortunes!  Honest!

A word beginning with Z:                        "Xylophone.."
 A slang word for a girl:                           "Slag.."
An animal with horns:                             "A bee…"
A medieval weapon:                               "Hand-grenade.." 
Something made of wool:                       "A sheep.."


Something a bridegroom might wear:                                             "A dress.."
 Someone you wouldn’t expect to see in a strip club:                      "Animals.."
 An animal with a long tail:                                                              "A rabbit.." 
Something a train-spotter would have in his pocket:        "A magnifying glass.."

 Something you put out for the birds:                                              "Worms.."
 A way to prevent snoring:                                    "Put a pillow over his face.."
A word used to describe a very hot day:                               "A very hot day.."
 A song from ‘The Sound Of Music’:                                      "Dancing Queen.."
(Also from the same family: "I wake up each morning..",  "The skies are
blue..", and "Over the hills and far away..")
 Someone who works early hours:                                               "A burglar.."
 Something made to be wheeled around:                                    "A hammer.."
 A reason for kneeling:                                                      "To be beheaded.." 
A nickname for a slim person:                                                        "Slimmy.."
 A measurement of liquid:                                                                  "Paint.."
 Something that’s nice to wear next to your skin:                               "Pants.."
 A famous Dick:                                                                               "Carrot.." 
A wild animal that’s native to Britain:                                                "A bear.."
Something Santa does at your house:                               "Feeds your pets.."
 Something that comes in 7’s:                                                        "Fingers.." 
A vocalist known by only one name:                                  "Michael Jackson.."
 A yellow fruit:                                                                               "Orange.."
 An animal beginning with B:                                                           "Bullfrog.."
Something associated with Liverpool:                        "The Yellow Brick Road.."
A boy mentioned in a nursery rhyme:                         "Little Red Riding Hood.."
 Something associated with Queen Victoria:                           "Her husbands.."
Something you hide in your socks when you go swimming:          "Your legs.." 
A place you would keep a pen:                                                         "A zoo.."
Something you beat:                                                                   "An apple.."
 Something associated with rain:                                                     "Water.."
 An animal that lives in the English countryside:                                 "A lion.." 
Something you make into a ball:                                                       "Eggs.."
 A game that uses a black ball:                                                          "Darts.."
 A popular TV soap:                                                                          "Dove.."
 Other than ‘carrier’, a type of bag:                                                   "Horse.."
Something you might find in a garage:                                   "a grand piano.."
 Something a Frenchman would say :                                          "On Garde.."
A fast animal:                                                                                 "A hippo.."
 Something you keep in the garden:                                                   "A cat.." 
Something that gives you goosebumps:                                          "Mumps.."
 A character from Little Red Riding Hood:                          "Hansel and Gretel.."
 Something that has a shell:                                                           "Batman.."
 Any dance apart from the waltz:                                          "The ball dance.."
Something a policeman might say:                                            "Spread ’em.."
 Something that frightens Dracula:                         "The King of the Vampires.."
 A non-living object with legs:                                                           "A plant.."
 A sign of the Zodiac:                                                                           "April.."
 An animal associated with a nursery rhyme:                             "Andy Pandy.."
 A mode of transport that you can walk in:                               "Your shoes.."
 An animal with big ears:                                                                  "A bear.."
Something you do on water:                                                      "Wallpaper.."
 A musical instrument you can play in the bath:                           "A drum kit.."
 Something associated with Egypt:                                                  "Cigars.."
 A part of your body you only have one of:                              "Your big toe.." 
Something you pull:                                                                     "A potato.."
 An animal used as a form of transport:                                          "A turtle.."
 A famous Phil or Philip:                                                           "Phil Johnson.."
 A habit people try to give up:                                                        "Spitting.." 
A Thunderbirds character:                                                     "Doctor Spock.."
 A TV gameshow with  ‘family’ in the title:                   "The Generation Game.."
 A seaside resort on the south coast:                                   " Rio de Janeiro.." 
Something you open other than a door:                                "Your bowels.."
 Something with a red light on it:                                              "a Dalek.."
 Something that makes you scream:                                       "A squirrel.."
 A food than can easily be eaten without chewing:                      "Chips.."
 A type of record:                                                                 "A floppy disk.."
 A type of large cat:                                                               "Persian.."
 A job that a working dog does:                                             "A slave.." 
Something people might be allergic to:                                    "Skiing.."
 An occupation where you need a torch:                                 "A burglar.."
 A well known superstition:                                    "Running in front of a car.."
Something you use a microchip in:                                          "A fish-fryer.."
 A dangerous race:                                                                 "The Arabs.."
 A game played in the dark:                                                     "Charades.."
Some famous brothers:                                                  "Bonnie and Clyde.."
A jacket potato topping:                                                   "Jam.."
 A part of the body you have more than two of:               "Arms.."
 Something you find on a fire engine:                                "Coal.."
 A famous royal:                                                              "Mail.." 
Something you do before going to bed:                            "Sleep.."
 An item of clothing worn by the Three Muskateers:          "A horse.."
 An animal you see at the zoo:                                         "Dog.."
 Something you might do in a power cut:                          "Read a book.."
A famous Parisian landmark:                                              "Hawaii.."
 One of Harry Enfield’s characters:                                     "Sooty.."
 A famous Irishman:                                                          "Disraeli.."
The first place detectives look for fingerprints:                    "The floor.." 
Something you associate with the sea:                               "A coffin.."
 A famous Arthur:                                                           "Shakespeare.."
A type of cut:                                                                  "Skull.."
A weapon in the game of Cluedo:                                      "Dice.." 
Something people take to the beach:                                 "Turkey.."
 A reason someone digs a hole in the road:                        "Grave digger.."
 An ingredient in chicken stuffing:                                        "Chicken.."
 Something you should know about a man before marrying him: "His name.."
 A bird with a long neck:                                                     "A blackbird.."
A bird with a long neck (2):                                               "Naomi Campbell.." 
An item of clothing a woman might borrow from a man:      "Underpants.."
 Something taken from a hotel as a souvenir:                    "The lamps.."
Something you keep in a garden shed:                             "A gardener.." 
A song with moon in the title:                                          "Blue Suede Moon.."
A famous cowboy:                                                          "Buck Rogers.."
 A famous Wild-West character:                                       "Wild Bill Eacock.."
Something you’d associate with the three bears:              "Red Riding Hood.." 
Fruit used in fruit salad:                                                    "Cucumber.."
 Something you wear on the beach:                                 "A deckchair.."
 A method of cooking fish:                                                "Cod.."
 Something you borrow from your partner:                       "Shoes.." 
A part of the body beginning with N:                                   "Knee.."
 A famous Scotsman:                                                         "Vinnie Jones.."
A famous Scotsman (2):                                                     "Jock.."
 Something red:                                                              "My cardigan.." 
A kind of ache:                                                                "Fillet-o-fish.."
Something you open other than a door:                            "Your bowels.."
 Something with a hole in it:                                               "A window.."
 Something you do in the bathroom:                                 "Decorate.." 
Something you put on walls:                                             "Roofs.."
 A domestic animal:                                                           "A leopard.."
 Something that floats in the bath:                                     "Water.."
 Something in the garden that’s green:                               "The shed.."
Something a blind man might use:                                      "A sword.."
 The last thing you take off before going to bed:                  "Your feet.."
 Something that flies without an engine:                        "A bicycle with wings.."

 

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