The mayor of Guayaquil in Ecuador has found a talented stand-in to fulfil his duties when he is otherwise engaged. At a specially arranged press conference last week he introduced him to his fiercest critics, the city’s press corps. They have pursued him relentlessly recently over the social security ‘reforms’ he has been trying to introduce.
‘This parrot,’ for so it was, ‘will,’ he announced, ‘be available to answer all your undesirable comments and questions. You people only approach me with nonsense talk. The parrot can speak your language. Meanwhile I will get on with the work I am paid to do.’
It is rumoured that the DUP are in secret negotiations about a bid to purchase this valuable animal. It is a matter of some urgency as old Eoin Parsley won’t be around for ever.