I know you are a computer expert and perhaps the very person to help me. I’ve had a lot of trouble with mine!
The man said I could fax with the machine so I held the paper up to the TV (or is that the monitor?) and hit ‘Send’ but it didn’t. I can’t find the ‘ANY’ key that it keeps telling me to Press.
Then it started to tell me I was ‘bad’ and an ‘invalid’. Isn’t that just rude?
I tried printing but the machine said it couldn’t find the printer. I turned the TV thing round to face the printer, but it still couldn’t find it. I called the helpline but the fellow just wanted to know if I was operating under windows. I told him the light was fine, I could see well what I was doing! He told me to type ‘P’ to bring up the Programme Manager. I told him I couldn’t find the ‘P’.
‘P on your keyboard’, he roared. Now, I wasn’t going to do that!
Then my coffee-cup holder broke! You know that drawer that keeps popping in and out. Well, no sooner did I rest the full cup of coffee on it that didn’t it pop in again and spilled the hot liquid all through that big tower box. I filled the bath-tub with soap and water to clean it all out. But it did no good!
Agnes, do you think he was taking the p*** outa me?
Box it up and send it back.
You’re too stupid to own a computer.